Happiness Rarely Returns To The Crime Scene
Why do I always end up repeating the same patterns? Why do I always meet similar people? Maybe I subconsciously make the same mistakes as everyone else: I seek happiness again and again from where I last lost it.
It is not that happiness avoids us. The point is that it rarely returns to the crime scene. Instead of seeing this and stepping out of our comfort zone to look for it in different environments and situations, we always try to find it in the same place.
However, it is normal for us to continue to betray ourselves, to find ourselves in similar situations, and to believe that this is just bad luck. But this is not bad luck. This is blindness. Blindness that prevents us from looking for new alternatives that pushes us back to places we know are bad after all. So at least we know the end result.
Fear makes us demand impossible things
Fear of change. Everyone has certainly heard of this. We are so afraid to leave our own comfort zone, and on top of that, we have an almost obsessive need to create them. When we feel comfortable with a particular situation, we want to stay in it. The whole idea that things can be uncomfortable or annoying means that we tolerate anything that allows us to stay in our own comfort zone.
But in terms of happiness, staying in the comfort zone prevents us from finding well-being and balance. This is because we continue to return to a place that happiness left behind, instead of following it.
This prevents us from being aware that all the places we think we are safe do hide the violence, exploitation, disrespect, and painful situations that cause suffering. They capture us away from the long-awaited happiness. However, we keep repeating the same mistakes and always return to the same place.
Sometimes this happens because we are used to living in a certain way. Maybe by tolerating too much because we don’t set boundaries or because we allow ourselves to be snatched as expected… All of this makes us fall into the same trap over and over again. How can we get rid of this? Either by opening our eyes or falling to the bottom so we can get up from there again.
We can’t let go of what doesn’t offer happiness
What exactly makes us seek happiness where we lost it? This is the inability to let go and detach ourselves from what hurts us so much. Instead, we cling to it unconsciously.
Is this because we are afraid to be alone? Maybe it’s because we just want to settle down. Are we afraid that change is too late? These beliefs are undeniably negative, they prevent us from letting go of what makes us unhappy. What happens when we try to let go? Anxiety takes over us.
It may seem that a cure for this is worse than the disease itself. But this feeling does not last long and its consequences are undeniably worthwhile, so that we can release that heavy load that we have carried for too long.
The fun is that in our minds we usually look for paths that have already been completed, for we know all the bends, turns, and potholes in this path. For maybe at first everything was fine and we were really happy. But when everything falls before us, we look nostalgically at our past.
So the big question goes like this: is this worth it? Our time in this world is limited. We should not waste it or look at the signs or our pain through our fingers. When something doesn’t work, we have to look for new alternatives, or at least think things over again when we know for sure something that doesn’t have a happy outcome. Are we really looking for happiness, or are we just looking for a safe way in life?
